TV. Is there nothing it can't teach us?

Through the miracle of Japander, I now know how everyone can run for days straight on 24. The answer? Calorie Mate! There's an extended story about it on Tokyo Times, which includes links to a couple of the commercials, too.

Other things TV has taught me:

• Pachinko is good! SANYO PACHINKO I'M COMIN!
• Shooting a .50 cal sniper rifle into a pool makes a big explosion
• Adam Sessler likes dressing up as Hunter S. Thompson
• What double-super-secret background is. (Infinity plus one on opposite day, indeed.)

Also, since I was looking it up for work, I thought I'd post a link to the Anne Elk sketch here.

Anne Elk: What is my theory that it is? Yes. Well, you may well ask what is my theory.
Presenter: I am asking.
Anne Elk: And well you may. Yes, my word, you may well ask what it is, this theory of mine. Well, this theory, that I have, that is to say, which is mine,... is mine.
Presenter: I know it's yours! What is it?
Anne Elk: ... Where? ... Oh! Oh! What is my theory?
Presenter: Yes!
Anne Elk: Ahh! My theory, that I have, follows the lines that I am about to relate. (starts prolonged throat clearing)
Presenter: (under breath) Oh, God! (Anne still clearing throat)
Anne Elk: The Theory, by A. Elk (that's "A" for Anne", it's not by a elk.)
Presenter: Right...
Anne Elk: (clears throat) This theory, which belongs to me, is as follows... (more throat clearing) This is how it goes... (clears throat) The next thing that I am about to say is my theory. (clears throat) Ready?
Presenter: (wimpers)
Anne Elk: The Theory, by A. Elk (Miss). My theory is along the following lines...
Presenter: (under breath)God!
Anne Elk: ...All brontosauruses are thin at one end; much, much thicker in the middle and then thin again at the far end. That is the theory that I have and which is mine and what it is, too.
Presenter: That's it, is it?
Anne Elk: Right, Chris!
Presenter: Well, Anne, this theory of yours seems to have hit the nail right on the head.
Anne Elk: ... and it's mine.

I have a cold today, it's supposed to be quite hot, and I have two things scheduled almost simultaneously this evening. Maybe now is time to start looking into my alternate dimension theory again...